June 19, 2016

Hit by a wave...

We are Expats, we have moved many a times, we have left homes and started anew with much enthusiasm and motivation in new locations again and again. However, there is a limbo in between these two stages that makes my heart sink every time I think about it. Once the movers arrive to pack my life up into boxes I know the moment is near when I'll need to step out of my front door never to return again.

It is like watching a huge wave heading your way. You can see it coming and you know once it reaches you it will hit you hard - really hard - but you also know you cannot avoid it, you NEED to get through it. The wave is a whirlwind of emotions all happening at the same time: vulnerability, happiness, sadness, relief, anxiety, enthusiasm, weariness, curiosity and eventually exhaustion. When you emerge the other side of this wave you are not the same person, something has shifted. You have closed a chapter of your life to start a new one. Your attitude with which you begin writing this pristine page will often set the tone of a more or less smooth settling down for you and your family.

Moving within the same city has been a new experience for me. Usually I get to close the door behind me one last time, rush to the airport and am in floods of tears before the plane even takes off! It is part of the mourning process, a way to bid farewell to a place my family calls home.

This time I climbed into an Uber taxi carrying a hoover and two pairs of curtains to ride 1 km down the road and walk into our new home, only problem is: it isn't home... not just YET!


Leaving our imprint on the flat through these markings of Expat kids' growth over the years!

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