It has been sliding into my mind slowly but steadily, the feeling of frustration. It seems I have lost the excitement of living in Paris… and I'm starting to wonder, "What on earth am I doing here?"
This gloomy mood at the early stages of living abroad has a name: It is called the expat blues! But what do you call the yearning to move on to your next destination? When you cannot wait to learn a new language, discover a new culture, battle yet another foreign bureaucracy, make a bunch of new friends, start a new cycle and yes... feel you are starting all over again?
Of course, Paris is beautiful. The Eiffel Tower puts a smile on my face every time I walk passed it... still, everyday, after over seven years! The opportunities in this city are vast but so are the daily hurdles. None of it is exciting anymore! I am feeling much too grounded.
Might I be seeking cross-cultural stress or just a foreign infrastructure to tackle. I find myself remembering what inspires me in life, what thrives me and what fulfills me. It is travelling out of my comfort zone and creating a new safe space for my family.
No matter how mindful I might be, life without inspiration is like a black and white photograph of a rainbow. So, I am hoping the dark clouds will pass at least until Expat Girl has finished her high school. In the meantime I will have come up with a plan...
Good luck coming up with relief- pronto! I can truly relate to the sense of restlessness that you describe.
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